It was with a spring in my step that I made my way to one of our local pubs here in Kilcullen to join the newly reformed Kilcullen Writer’s Group. I just happened to spot a mention of it on the The Diary and thought… I’ll have some of that thank you!
At the recent Culture Night event held in the town, members of the original group had been inspired to restart it. Perfect timing for me – and very considerate of them to hold it just a short walk from my house 🙂
There were 5 of us (with an extra 2/3 promising to come to the next one). All women and all with different writing experiences and styles. It was so nice to chat with folk who ‘get it’! This is still relatively new for me and already I feel I’ve bored anyone who’s not into the writing thing! We discussed inspiration, disappointment, what we read, writer envy, pen & paper v computer, courses & retreats, and we all read something we’d written.
To type or to scribble?!
We talked for about two hours and laughed for most of it. Already there’s an excursion on the cards and even the possibility of getting involved in Kilcullen’s contribution to The Gathering festivities…
It was all very encouraging & inspiring and just what I need as I contemplate some big changes coming my way – more on that anon.
Suffice to say, I’ve found the perfect therapy group. I go along, confidently stand up and say “Hello I’m Annmarie”, (nod at responses.. Hi Annmarie) “and yes… I am a writer”. And the great thing group is… I don’t even have to quit my addiction!
I wrote the following for radio. The situation has passed and it seems that everything is going to be ok. But now a friend finds herself in a similar position. So rather than say it all again I thought I’d share the piece I wrote and recorded. Janey isn’t her real name btw…
Janey! What will God say?
As I sit here I’m praying for a little girl. Janey and her mammy, daddy, granny and everyone else connected to her. She’s not well and no one is 100% sure what the problem is. It has the potential to be life threatening or it may be a condition that needs a lot of treatment…. and once that’s administered she’ll be right as rain.
But at the moment we don’t know.
Now I could wait… and write this when it’s all over. When we know what the diagnosis and prognosis is. I could wait until we’re either broken hearted by the worst news and terrified for her future, or relieved beyond belief and determined to be thankful every day for her!
I’m one of the few ‘committed Christians’ that the family know. And as usual I was one of the first people to be contacted about it and asked to pray. And that’s great. But I must be honest, the whole area of ‘hoping’ and ‘God’ is a difficult one for me at times. I’ve been through that process. I’ve been through the receiving bad news… possibility it’s wrong… then confirmation that it’s right… but possibility it can be fixed… then confirmation that it can’t… then surgery, then childlessness. All through that time half the world was praying. I was confident that God would heal me, and not only that, but my whole family would see His glory and fall to their knees and worship Him for the rest of their days.
But God said no.
Not… ‘keep praying Annmarie’, not ‘maybe’ and I’m still finding it hard to believe he was saying ‘No, but I’ve got something better for you.’ He just said no. That was 10 years ago. And it took a long time for me to accept it.
My 27 nieces and nephews 🙂 They take the sting out of not being a mammy ❤
That whole process now changes how I respond to Janey’s situation. I pray as passionately as I’ve ever prayed for her test results to be positive only for something easy for her and us to deal with. That is my heart’s desire. But as a Christian I MUST pray that God’s will is done. I MUST pray that no matter what the diagnosis, Janey’s parents and other family will be strong, will be comforted by God and will work together to help each other.
And if they shake their fists at God, that He will respond like the merciful One that He is – and will show mercy. And that even in the midst of the panic and the pain that one day they will see His glory and fall to their knees and worship Him for the rest of their days. Not because He has given us the answer we wanted, but because he is worthy of all glory, honour and praise…. even when he says NO!
When I was on the Writer’s Retreat last Saturday I took one of the suggested titles and made it in to a silly poem. I’m fairly convinced that National Poetry Day strives for higher than this effort but ahh shure… I might as well…
There’s a Mouse in the House (I can’t remember who suggested this title – let me know if it was you!)
There’s a mouse in the house, I can hear it
He’s scratching his way ‘round the floor
I can’t say I’ve seen him
Maybe I dreamed him
Oh janey I hope there’s no more!
this is the only mouse I ever want to encounter thank YOU!
There’s a mouse in the house, heaven help me
I’m afraid of me life of those things
They’re slimy and hairy
And just a bit scary
And think of the germs that he brings
There’s a mouse in the house and I hate him
He chewed his way through me phone cable
Escaping the trap
He left loads of crap
Me nerves are in bits, I’m not able
There’s a mouse in the house, I can’t bear it
Move house, it’ll be for the best
I’ll sell the place cheap
The lot they can keep
I just want to be rid of that pest
There’s a mouse in the house, I’ve gone barmy
I thought I saw two little eyes
They darted right past me
Tiny but ghastly
The power he has at his size!
There’s a mouse in the house – but I’ve cracked it!
I’ve borrowed a cat for a week
It’s the end for that mouse
From now on in this house
There won’t be so much as a squeak
Well folks my Grafton Media Blog Awards Ireland journey has ended for this year – as I haven’t made the finals. Big thanks to the organisers who have been working very hard. And they’re not finished yet! Congratulations and best of luck to all the finalists! Keep an eye on #bloggm for further updates.
Despite the disappointment, yesterday was a fantastic day. I spent it at a Carousel Creates Writer’s Retreat. It’s a fabulous place in the most idyllic setting. The views are as promised, inspiring. I met a small group of writers, all at different ages and stages of life and writing. It was great to chat and learn from others. There was plenty of coffee, lovely food and a walk up towards (but not all the way to) the Hell Fire Club. (For those not familiar with the HFC, its an old building with some interesting history, perched on Montpelier Hill in the Dublin /Wicklow mountains – google at will ;))
One of the beautiful views I could see as I was writing and thinking about writing 😀
The main aim of the day was to get some serious writing done. So although we walked, talked and ate, we spent most of out time typing/writing away. I had asked on FB and Tw for suggestions for titles of short pieces to write in the morning session. I wanted to see how well I could ‘write on demand’. I’m used to being able to pick my own titles… So of the long list I ended up with, I picked 4.
This is normal life, it’s not easy – suggested by Trish Nugent
The hardest thing I ever had to do – suggested by Karen Mulreid
There’s a mouse in the house – suggested by errrr, can’t remember (or find it on FB/Tw)
The Redemption of Knicker Elastic – suggested by Rhoda Doyle Yeomans
There’s some voting on FB as to which one goes up first… add a comment if you want to pick one. There were plenty more and I’ve added them to my pot of ideas for the future. 🙂
I had decided that in the afternoon, I was going to spend time thinking about the ‘humour’ side of stuff I write and try to work out if it’s something I can do ‘on demand’ or something I can only do spontaneously when I’m in a good mood. But a conversation at lunch changed all that. We started to talk about Moone Boy; how Chris O’Dowd had written this story based on his childhood, but not totally autobiographical.
Me and my niece around 1978 I think…
That got me thinking about a biography based on my dad’s life rather than a real life biography. But then with so many in the family it would take me years to get the ok for each chapter 😉 Then I thought… well someone else then! Who’s life can I write about that I won’t have to get the ok for? Oh… yeah… me..! So I spent the afternoon randomly scribbling the first few thoughts on a story based on my own childhood. I took memories that I have and merged them with a bit of made-up stuff. I genuinely don’t know if I have a talent for fiction but I think this is worth giving a go. Who know… I may end up with classic… Moone Girl maybe? I might even drum up the courage to post a section of it on the fiction blog… someday!
I ended yesterday with a host of new ideas. It was a great salve to the ouch of not getting into the finals. So… I shall write on 😉
I’ve been trying not to go overboard on the whole “vote for me” thing, but it seems my vague references to the voting procedure are not helpful! Particularly to the technophobes in my family who don’t know their hashtags from their URLs!
So here’s the skinny.. the gen… the suss… the story… and the instructions.
For the Best Personal Blog category – well your work there is done. The Grafton Media Blog Awards judges are almost done voting. The numbers are being counted this week and the finalist list will be announced on Friday! If I believed in luck I’d ask yiz all to cross everything, but sure you know me… 🙂
For Best Blog Post – you have 9 days to get me in to the final 10 entries. Now at this stage it’s nigh on impossible as I’m about 40th at the mo. But I’m still in and you can vote this week and next week if you like.
You’ve got to click on the link below – It takes you to a page. You scroll down to where it says “Just another Christian woman talking through her hat…
You click on the little circle.
Then scroll down to the bottom of the page and click vote.
To be clear … clicking ‘like’ here or on Facebook doesn’t count
The post is “A Tribute to my 27 Nieces and Nephews” – to read it click here – you might want to before voting for it! 😀
Make sure to go to the FB page if you wanna vote for this pic 😀
Now ANOTHER vote you can give me is for the pic I submitted to win 2 tickets to the awards night. Go to this Facebook page and have a look at the pics. Mine is on the last page (page 4) and it’s of me! looking fabliss 😀 There’s a little tickbox to vote on the pic.
SO all modesty shunned, giz an oul vote and shure you never know…
I’ve a bottle of champagne in the fridge from my 40th birthday in March. If I get on to the finalists list of the Best Personal Blog category, I’ll be cracking it open and when it’s empty I’ll write a blog post straight away – or maybe not 😀
These days I’m a pretty poor evangelist! I wasn’t always like this. I used to be brave, bold, fearless. I also used to be obnoxious, arrogant, bordering on downright rude! Shame I didn’t land somewhere in the middle really.
One of my funnier brushes with the coal face of evangelism happened in conjunction with my Dad. He can always be relied upon to move any story into the hilarious/embarrassing category. However it wasn’t him I was trying to win over. I came home from work one day and he informed me that 2 religious men (not priests now…!) had been at the door. They were dressed in suits and ties and had haversacks and clipboards with them. When they asked my Dad if he was interested in religion his reply was something along the lines of… “Oh now my daughter Annmarie is in to all that, she’s not here at the moment but call back next week and she’ll talk to you about it. Sure she’d talk to you for hours about it. Call back when she’s here” and he promptly shut the door.
He was delighted he had dispensed of them with so little time and effort, my mam was DISGUSTED that he had invited them back but I was thrilled at the prospect of leading these two poor misguided souls into the light.
It was a few weeks later and I’d almost given up hope that they would come back. Then I saw them out the kitchen window. Two men in suits, clipboards in hand. This was it!!! I ran to the door, swung it open and before they drew breath I said – something along the lines of,
“Now before you start I want you to know that I am a born again, Bible believing Christian. I believe Jesus is the son of God. He is the Saviour of the world, died for our sins, raised from the dead to give us life and if you’re here to offer me a half baked version of this Gospel then don’t bother. And before you start arguing points of doctrine let me tell you that nothing…NOTHING… changes what God has done in my heart and in my life and maybe it is YOU that needs to sort out what you believe about God.”
I stood there, Charlton Heston-like, I could almost feel the staff in my hand and the wind in my hair and I’m sure I heard the distant strains of… “Let my people go!!!!”
After a moment’s silence I looked at the two men for the first time. they were both pale, with their mouths open. One still had his finger in the air where he had not quite managed to ring the bell. The other had a business card in his hand and slowly handed it me saying.. “eh we’re from Alcorn Insurance and… well… we were really just wondering if you’d… well if you might be interested… eh… well a chat about.. well… life insurance? But I suppose you… you probably don’t think you… need it.”
The following few minutes are a bit of a blur really. But they hurried back down the path and I shut the door and stared at my shoes for a bit. Sad day when the best your new found faith can do is drive evangelists (and insurance salesmen) away from your door.
My life assurance documents 🙂
I’d love to think that those guys are now leading mission teams to the Peruvian villages and Indian deserts. But I’m afraid I can’t confirm that, it is possible I suppose.
But one thing I’m fairly certain of, they aren’t selling insurance anymore!!!
I’ve connected with a group of mad yokes on Twitter! They’re a motley crew of complainers and curmudgeons and I love them to bits. 😀 There’s quite a bit of ranting going on, but they are very respectful to me even though I don’t fully agree with them, and in fairness don’t fully understand them either.
I was tempted to start a revolution meself when I saw this on the road to Kenmare!
Some are looking for a revolution. Some are angry at our government. Most seem frustrated with the cuts that are chipping away at the best asset that Ireland has ever had – her people. It’s a passionate cry to ‘give Ireland back her heart’ as one guy puts it. Having grown up listening to my granny singing ‘rebel songs’, these guys remind me of the spirit of those old come-all-ye’s. Songs about the fight for freedom and justice that came with a huge cost but was never really won. The aching heart of the ‘fighting Irish’… it’s all there.
The other frustration for them is how few there are joining them in their ‘crusade’. The fact that I am responding and engaging in the conversation has earned me a bit of kudos I think! Today I was even offered the position of ‘Captain’! But I graciously declined it. 🙂 You see guys, I’m sorry but I can’t join your revolution.
I really don’t believe that is what God wants – not for me and not for Ireland. When I pray the ‘Our Father’, I ask for His Kingdom to come on earth as it is in Heaven. When the Kingdom of God came in the time of Jesus, it did not come as believers of God thought it would. It wasn’t a political overthrow. It was quiet person by person regeneration. Jesus didn’t come in and sweep the government to one side, changing the political scene from the top down (which He would have had the God given authority to do). No , Jesus came to the people and changed hearts and minds, encouraging us to change our communities – from the ground up and out!
The Bible tells me to pray for those who have been put in authority over me. It’s not easy, especially when I have so little faith in any of them, but it also tells me I’m to obey them and not rebel against them. It doesn’t mean I sit back and ignore what’s going on. But I can’t rant and rave and I can’t captain a revolution. Even though it sounds like fun 😉
Thanks for your friendship gang! Don’t give up hope on our country just yet. God’s got her firmly in His sights and He’s not finished with us. Yiz are in my prayers along with our native land.
And if you have one more minute to spare before it’s time to storm the gates 🙂 have a read of this…
Isaiah 42
A bruised reed he will not break, a smoldering wick He will not snuff out!
1 Here is my servant, whom I uphold, my chosen one in whom I delight;
I will put my Spirit on him and he will bring justice to the nations. 2 He will not shout or cry out, or raise his voice in the streets. 3 A bruised reed he will not break, and a smoldering wick he will not snuff out.
In faithfulness he will bring forth justice; 4he will not falter or be discouraged
till he establishes justice on earth. In his law the islands will put their hope.”
So… if you’ve read review #1 you’ll know that we got drenched to the bone on day 1 of our hols. But the sun shone for the rest of the week. So much so that by day 3 I was sunburnt and wondering where in the attic the Factor 20 might be… We drove to Kenmare – what a beautiful little town! Strolling through the market I picked up some second hand books including an copy of ‘Juno and the Paycock’, an Irish play I studied in secondary school.
We had the most wonderful relaxing time. And as I mentioned, I got lots of reading done.
So to my second book review…
Sons of Cain by Val Bianco
Sons of Cain by Val Bianco
After I read the prologue of this book I was intrigued but a little skeptical of how the story would progress. The book is a work of fiction but starts with an account of Pope Leo XIII’s vision on October 13th 1884. This actually happened and is well documented. It surprised me by turning out to be exactly what I love to read. Well mostly… Style wise – think John Grisham meets Dan Brown meets Frank Peretti with a bit of The Screwtape Letters thrown in for good measure!
Sons of Cain is a story that unfolds in two realms. On earth there is the appearance of a deeply hidden cult that is so extreme in its nature, it is considered by most to be folklore and exaggeration. But it is real and its influence and evil intent reaches far into the corridors of power right to the Supreme Court and the Oval Office itself. Then there is the team of godly men working secretly to fight this evil. (Already you can see why it’s right up my street.) In the other realm, the spiritual realm, demons and angels work to influence, help, hinder, trap, kill, save… and every so often the two realms collide.
As a Christian who loves action/thrillers this was a great combination but every so often it felt as if some very specific doctrine was being ‘crowbar-ed’ in to the story. The author is Roman Catholic and the odd time it felt like he was pulling me out of the story to correct my theology. I was raised Roman Catholic, but have lived most of my ‘committed Christian’ life outside of the RC church – so I realise my antennae were on high alert. There were a few nods towards why Protestants/Evangelicals have it wrong and at times I got frustrated and just wanted to get back into the story.
Having said that, it was fast moving, the story continued to unfold and kept getting better. There was some truly terrifying imagery but it rang true and reminded me that there is a lot going on that we don’t see. It also was a reminder that good eventually triumphs over evil, but at a cost.
I was a bit disappointed that it didn’t end exactly as I’d have loved it too (don’t want to do a spoiler here…) but it was fitting that fulfillment in serving God and his purposes was the priority. All in all a great combo of action and spirituality. If you’re into the things of God you’ll enjoy it. Especially if you’re a Catholic! 😀
I was off work sick. Curled up on the sofa, watching a film. I pressed the ‘pause’ button and went to the kitchen to make another Lemsip. But by the time I got back to the sitting room the player had gone asleep and the telly had kicked back in. “Grrr…. I hate when that happens!” The inconvenience of it all…
I saw the ‘Breaking News’ banner flashing as I fumbled with the remote control and as I went to press ‘play’ I looked up and saw the two towers with the plume of smoke coming out of one of them. As the commentary continued I sat at the edge of the sofa just shaking my head slowly saying, ‘No… way… no… way… ‘ then, well I thought my heart would stop when the 2nd plane hit the other tower.
I watched the telly for hours and days afterwards as the towers collapsed and the story of the other planes unfolded. The world has never been the same since. Even now, many long frustrating queues in airports are because no one knows if, when, where something like this will happen again. But listening now to the victims’ names being read out, one by one – it’s clear that the love and strength of those left behind is far more powerful than any force used to bring destruction that day.
On the Official 9/11 Commemoration Website, the 9/11 Memorial President Joe Daniels says of th2 11th anniversary,
“Despite the unimaginable tragedy of 9/11 itself, this day is also about the spirit of unity that came in the aftermath. It showed us that the best of humanity can overcome the worst hate. It gave us hope for the future.”1
When I think about it, I’m shocked at how many people I know who have been affected by suicide. Today is the start of Suicide Awareness Week and marks Suicide Awareness Day around the world.
There are two people that come to mind in particular today. One I’d known since I was a kid. I fancied him like mad and dreamed of marrying him one day. He was a great laugh! Even though I hadn’t seem him for years, cos he was my brother’s mate, I invited him to my wedding – not as the groom tho 🙂 It was different from any other wedding he’d been to and he loved it! I remember him running over to me at one stage shouting, “Amo, this is a BRILLIANT day!” with his huge smile.
The other person I’m thinking about today I didn’t know as well, or for as long. She was a beauty! She was a scream too. I remember a wedding we were both at – we were dancing like mad women 😉 She was a fiesty fiery redhead – another one with a big bright smile…
I’ve had down days. Some VERY dark and dismal days! But I don’t remember a day when I felt I didn’t have anyone in world that I could talk to, or that there was no way out of a situation. I can’t imagine what that would be like. How crushing it must be to feel that there is no way out and no one who can help.
I can’t give enough praise for Pieta House – an organisation working to prevent suicide and self harm in Ireland. Their work is inspiring – and tireless. And this week I’d encourage you to look at their website, Facebook page, Twitter feed – what ever is your thing. Get involved, raise awareness , or a few quid even – and let’s work together to help those who feel helpless.
There is always hope! My hope is in Christ Jesus. I know not everyone reading this shares that hope. But hope still exists and help can be found. You are not alone.
You are NOT alone!
Psalm 121 1 I lift up my eyes to the hills— where does my help come from? 2 My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth.
Just another Christian woman... 