My Songwriting Career starts here (or not…)

After the success of my hit single “Is that what it’s all about?” The Twoky Kokey I’ve been commissioned to write a song for a Twitter budso @johnmurphy51 to the tune of ‘My Lovely Horse. (If you’re not familiar with this ‘Fr. Ted’ hit just click here to see the youtube clip)
Have you got the tune in your head now? Ok then… here we go!

(oh lovely lovely lovely John)

Oh lovely John
One of Twitter’s gems
Why are you tweetin’ when you should be meetin’ lovely girls?
I want to take you to a singles bar, or maybe to a teadance
Set you up with a nice cailín, & sort you out with some romance

(oh lovely lovely lovely John)

Oh lovely John
Your opinions are strong
Running the country would be easy for you, cos you’re sure you are right….
Even though you’re not ‘Right’…!

*Saxophone Solo
Well nearly always right!

Actually… we’ll have to lose that Sax solo

As promised, a song for ALL my Twitter followers :)

As promised, in celebration of reaching more than 1000 followers on Twitter I have written a song for you all 🙂

I’ve mentioned a few tweeps and would love to have been able to crowbar a few more of you in, but really there aren’t many Twitter names that rhyme with other Twitter names – or that rhyme with… just… words!

I’ve taken a little bit of license with the ‘scanning’ of the words. General rule…  if there is a number at the end of a Twitter name I’ve ignored it for the purposes of (and I use this term loosely…) poetry. The only one that doesn’t apply to is @booksmusic72 – the ‘2’ is crucial for the purposes of (and I use this term even more loosely this time…) poetry.
The stuff in brackets in the chorus is to be shouted out!

And so.. to the tune of “The Hokey Kokey” I give you

A song for my Twitter followers...

Is That What it’s All About?

So what’s on Twitter folks?
Some famous blokes,
strong opinions & some Bible quotes
There’s ‘Cats that look like Hitler’ & some dogs in skirts
Is that what it’s all about ?

More followers on Twitter
More followers on Twitter
More followers on Twitter
#hashtag #retweet

There’s those that love the Left
And love the Right
Or think that politics is all a load of… rubbish 🙂
& half the #irishbizparty’s in Twitter jail!
Is that what’s it all about?

More followers on Twitter
More followers on Twitter (GIVE ME…)
More followers on Twitter
#hashtag #retweet

You’ll find an expert here
from every sphere
Writin’ farmin’, lovin’ eatin’ – Conquerin’ your fears
And anyone who’s anyone is writ’n a book!
Is that what it’s all about?

More followers on Twitter (GIVE ME…)
More followers on Twitter (I’VE GOT..)
More followers on Twitter
#hashtag #retweet

I love @adublinluas
& @ghook’s news
@nettiewriter & @conziesays too
@JohnMurphy51’s my guru, @richjm612’s my man
And they get a big #shoutout

More followers on Twitter (WAIT! WHAT?)
More followers on Twitter (HELP ME)
More followers on Twitter
#hashtag #retweet

And then there’s cool #kevq
@philipnolan1 & @dedewatson too
@jimsheridan replies to me, I’ll have you know
And they’re what it’s all about!

More followers on Twitter (CAN’T GO ON)
More followers on Twitter (NERVES ARE GONE)
More followers on Twitter
#hashtag #retweet

So now I’ve reached 1 K
I want to say
Thanks to my followers, I read you everyday
Well just the ones I follow back cos youse are MAD
And THAT’s what it’s all about!

More followers on Twitter (OH NO I’VE GOT…)
More followers on Twitter (HAVE LOST THE PLOT)
More followers on Twitter
#hashtag #retweet


More Odes to… Twitter followers

These are fast becoming my favourite things to write 🙂

In order to curry favour and get more Twitter followers, I’ve started to offer a personal ‘Ode to’ every 25th one…

Ode to follower #300 @booksmusic72

Number 300 subscribed! How can he best be described?

Whirling & tranquil? English & Thankful…

t’was a Scot lost the tennis & cried?


Ode to follower #325 @aDublin Bus

Being followed by@ADublinBus is not so very curious

Whatever number he may drive he’ll always be my 325!

But will I have  to choo-as, twixt him & @aDublinLuas?


So who’s next? 🙂

Normal Service Resumed! Here’s another Ode…

OK after yesterday I’m back to normal. Enough now of the ranting! I’m going back to what I do! I mean that’s what you’ve come here for isn’t it?

You’ve come for the funny! Right?



*small frog ‘ribbits‘ in the distance…

#theawkwardmoment when you’re forced to start a sentence with #theawkwardmoment…

OK then, well here goes…

My Ode to Twitter follower #275 @irishtonyo who hails from Wexford 🙂

Ode to #275!
@irishtonyo now follows me ye’know!
I thought I’d have to strive, to get 275
But tony saved the day, though Dub beat Wex today!

Ode to my 250th Twitter follower

This morning I promised on Twitter that my 250th follower would get and ‘ode’ written to them.

In practice mode (and cos he wanted me to) I wrote a little ditty for @IrelandsEar

In Ireland there once was an Ear, his opinion on issues was clear.

He never got bitter when tweeting on Twitter, And hashtag’d #vinb with no fear

But here is the prize winner’s… eh… prize

Ode to @psneeze

Oh @psneeze with silent p that doth tweet eloquently.

You choose to follow me? Number 250!

And I shall follow thee, until sneeze begins with p