More of a Go-Slow than a Fast this Lenten season

On By auntyamoIn Getting to grips with God stuffLeave a comment

So I’m NOT giving up FB for lent. Mainly cos I’m in the middle of a campaign 😀

I’ve decided that I’m going to do something that I would be harder than even stopping chocolate. I’m going to have at least 15 minutes of total silence every day. No phone, no music, no nothing.

You might think it’s a little thing but I can’t bear silence. But I’ve heard it’s a great thing to do. Hopefully I’ll get to enjoy, hopefully I’ll be able to do more than 15 mins at a time, hopefully my spirit and my mind will learn to be quiet too and hopefully it will lead to some real communication with God!

So day 1….. Let me give you a list of the stupid things that came into my head as I was trying to just think about God…

The cobwebs on the window, Fox’s Glacier Dark, my sister Liz, how much like eternity 15 minutes is, Dysons, the launch of my book entitled something like “It Started With a Fast: how I went from 15 mins of silence a day to utter pertection in 6 weeks”, my job, weight loss, weight gain (I’m yo-yo dieting in my head now!), soup and some other subjects that I’d rather not share.

Quite a lot covered in 15 minutes eh?

Now do you see why this is so hard for me?

Now do you see why abstaining from chocolate would probably be easier?

Oh I better dash, got to make dinner, where does the time go?????

I have seen the light (the telly and even the label on the soup tin)!!!

On By auntyamoIn My Cornea Transplant2 Comments

Yippee skippee and YEAY!!!!!!

Finally after almost 2 years of waiting to experience the benefits of my cornea transplant… I can see! The biggest difference is definitely with reading and typing. Everything had to be in 20pt and Arial or I couldn’t see it. And books…! Well I had to practically stick them to my nose to be able to read. (Not condusive to finishing an MA, I can tell you.)

I’ve got my new glasses now and it’s wonderful!

Not long after my op, in my regular piece in Vox Magazine ( http://www.vox.ie a great little magazine I highly recommend… and not just cos I’m in it :D) I told a story about a freak teapot accident I had while I was in hospital…

20 20 Vision?!
I recently had an eye operation. For a while the sight in my eye will be worse before it gets better and it is a slow but steady recovery.

A couple of days after the op I felt it was time to stop allowing people to pamper me. So when the staff brought me my tea on Day 3, I very firmly assured them that I was fine and needed no help.

I could see the tray and everything on it, I got my cup and saucer in front of me, picked up the teapot and promptly poured the tea into the saucer! I quickly grabbed what I thought was a white folded napkin and was mopping up the tea before I realised I was using the bread!!! Whatever I did next (and I’m not sure what that was), I sent the knife and fork flying off my tray and crashing to the floor.

I sat in the bed like a bold child who’d been caught doing something she shouldn’t have while a girl came back into the ward, took one look at the tray, one look at me, and without a word took the tray away returning with a new one; the tea already poured!

Although I could see all the things on the tray, I didn’t realise that I couldn’t really see them properly. I’m so looking forward to being able to see! My eyesight has been deteriorating for years. This op and the eventual op on the other eye will change my life and I’ll be able to see… clearly!

I’ve been reflecting on verse 12 in 1 Corinthians 13. The verse says, “For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part, then I shall know fully, even as I have been fully known.” (ESV) And I realise that after all my ops and recovery I STILL won’t have 20 20 vision. That won’t come until much later.

In the mean time, I’ll probably keep spilling the tea of imperfection in to the saucer of life; mopping it up with the bread of blindness!!!

But one day…I’ll get there. Just you wait and see!

From June 2010 edition of Vox Magazine http://www.vox.ie

Ahh the blind ol’ days 😀

Up to (date with) my eyeballs… have I got yiz in stitches???

On By auntyamoIn My Cornea Transplant3 Comments

Thanks to everyone who’s been keeping up to date with my eye situation. I know not all of you are pray-ers but I do appreciate all the support and good wishes from everyone.  (For those who are new to the story I had a cornea transplant in March of 2010)

Today didn’t go as expected but it was still good news…

I have been working towards getting all the stitches out (there are 13 of the original 16 still in there). And I thought today would be the day. I had misunderstood the procedure and thought that I couldn’t move on to the next step of recovery… new glasses, contacts etc until that happened.

Seemingly the vision in the eye is greatly improved. The shape of the cornea is very good and the stitches are all secure. So in cases like these they tend to leave well enough alone. I asked if it’s possible they would leave the stitches in forever and the Dr said that it was possible as long as they didn’t cause any problems.

I explained that I can’t wear my glasses at the moment, ergo I can’t drive. I need my glasses to give me better vision in my left eye, but when I’m wearing them the vision in my right eye is so bad it makes the room spin. And it turns out that this is because I don’t need glasses for my right eye now. I can get clear glass in the right eye and have an updated prescription in the left eye and I should be fine, actually better than fine… to read and drive etc. It’s not 20 20 vision or anything like that in the right eye but clear glass would be enough and probably the wiser option as the vision/cornea may change again.  

So I’ve already booked in with my optician to get new glasses. 🙂

I’m absolutely delighted with the outcome and again I appreciate all the prayers and interest in my cornea transplant journey. I’m also really excited that my cornea donor Brandon and his family have become a part of the story. His parents Diane and Bill and their friends have been praying for me and I’m hoping to meet them please God, later this year.

 

Me and my cornea donor Brandon Tucker who went to be with Jesus on Feb 23rd 2010. Thanks Brandon x

In case you didn’t know, I submitted a photo to an exhibition run by the Circle of Light Foundation in Colorado. It is connected to the Rocky Mountain Lions Eye Bank, which sent the cornea to Ireland from the US. The photo is of me holding my laptop with a picture of Brandon on the screen. I hope you like it.

A x

Ahhhh Mrs. Miles lovely to see you again, will you be staying long with us this time???

On By auntyamoIn Getting to grips with God stuff, Health, weight & wellbeing1 Comment

 A few weeks ago that familiar and hateful voice started to poke me in the ear with it’s verbal pencil…  “Amo… it’s time to… “pack up your sugars in your old kit bag and diet, diet diet…..” What a dismal thought. What was even more dismal was that this would be attempt #20 probably and here I am nearly 40 battling the same old (excuse my swedish… ) shite! As usual I ignored it for a while, smiled at family and friends who are ‘in the zone’ and kept my head down.

But I knew I’d have to do something. So I prayed. I pray quite a bit about a lots of things. (Mostly to do with myself if I’m honest.) But I prayed that God would help me. That he would inspire me and forgive me for being so rubbish at looking after myself. I thought maybe I wouldn’t write this in the blog and I’d start with my usual positive…. ‘here we go again… haha… aren’t me and me big bum just hilarious….’ But then I thought well if I’m going to talk about it I might as well be honest from the start.

So this is where I started… sighing… dreading talking about it and FACING it…! But as usual, God being the merciful One that He is made it a bit easier for me. First thing that happened was when I was researching books for work. Minding my own business I stumbled across a book by Lisa Terkeurst called ‘Made to Crave’ I laughed at the thought of it.  Then I saw the subtitle…  Satisfying Your Deepest Desire with God, Not Food.  I literally felt pain when I read that, and thought to myself… imagine if that were possible! I really didn’t want to read a book, but I spotted a 60 Day Devotional based on the book, so I ordered it.

The next thing was being introduced to ‘myfitnesspal.com’ One of my family, currently ‘in the zone’ showed me the iphone app. An iphone app about pretty much anything will get my attention! But it’s actually very helpful.

So on Monday I did what I’ve been promising to do every Monday since I was about 14. I started again…. I’m quietly and cautiously optimistic. Glad to have started again, at least it swats the ‘guilt bugs’! But I’m not kidding myself. I blogged for a year about weight loss and actually in one post declared myself to have conquered ‘this whole eating thing’ There’s a death knell if ever I heard one! Not long after I stopped blogging about food, and around the same time I stopped addressing the issue. That was more than 2 years ago!

This subject haunts me I don’t deny it. But as I checked-in to the all too familiar ‘Hotel Flabylon’ the devil, dressed in his best concierge outfit, with his smart ass smile said with his usual cynicism… “Ahhhh Mrs. Miles lovely to see you again, will you be staying long with us this time???”

I smiled right back at him, signing in with more flourish than necessary and said… Let’s just see shall we!?

Saint Bernard remembered

On By auntyamoIn Family, Getting to grips with God stuff1 Comment

Yesterday it was 10 years since my father in law Bernard Miles, went to be with the Lord. I have such great memories of him and still miss him. I loved him loads and loads. 🙂 I only knew him for 3 years, but I have some great memories…

 He loved me. He used to greet me by clapping his hands together and rubbing them, saying with a big smile (in his terrible Irish accent) “ahhh sure ‘tis yerself.” And I’d get a big hug. I always smile when I think of it. If ever we were on our own together he’d make a cup of tea or coffee and we’d have a chat. He used to say that he was delighted that Rich found someone who shared his two great loves…. God and music.

He loved Sundays. Before me and Rich were married we often stayed in their house. I’d come down stairs for breakfast with only minutes to spare and he’d be smiling brightly. “It’s the Lord’s Day Annmarie. We’re going to praise the Lord together. Isn’t this the best day!” I would grunt as positive an answer as I could muster and try to butter my toast with my eyes closed.

He loved to work. Very often you’d find him in his overalls attending to one little job or other that needed doing in the house or the garden. He had a garage/workshop that was cleaner than my kitchen. Everything was neatly arranged and in little individual pots or containers. If ever you said, “Dad, have you got one of those nails  shaped like an elephant?” He’d say, “oh I think I have hang on…” Into the garage he’d go; and lo and behold… he’d find one.

He knew I was lazy but he was very gracious. He was building a wall in the garden one time and one day I said, ‘Hey Nehemiah, lunch is ready’ and with a big smile said “the Bible says that Nehemiah had a mind to work Annmarie… and so did his family!”

He loved the Bible. He had such a great love for Scripture. I never heard him preach or lead a Bible study, but we came across some notes he’d made over the years. It’s obvious he had a great love and understanding of God’s Word. And any time I stayed in his house, at some stage during the day, I’d find him in the conservatory reading his Bible.

He loved God. Of all the things I remember about him, his love for Jesus is my most abiding memory of him. He had been sick, but he had an amazing attitude to his illness. He told me once that if he got to stay with us that would be great. But if he didn’t he’d get to be with Jesus. So from his point of view, he couldn’t lose.

“No Dad”, I thought to myself, “we’ll be the ones who lose”

He was and wonderful and had a wonderful witness. I will never forget him and thank God for every memory I have of him.

Taking a whole year one day at a time…

On By auntyamoIn Getting to grips with God stuffLeave a comment

Well well, it’s been a while I know. But I haven’t been totally silent. My ponderings have mainly turned up on the joint blog with my hubby www.ajourneyof2miles.wordpress.com as we have been on a bit of an advernture lately.

2011 has indeed been an adventure! I did things and went places and met people I never imagined I would in my whole life!

Highlights include….

I was contacted by the family of my cornea donor, from Indiana of all places. Now I’m in regular contact with his mum and planning to meet the family later this year. Subsequent to that I was asked to submit a photo for the exhibition called ‘Circle of Light’ which is run by the eye bank in the US. My photo was published as part of the exhibition. What a privilege!

I’ve continued my contributions to UCB Ireland Radio and now also do a weekly little spot on Spirit Radio with RoJo in the Mornings. Two very different types of input but I’m delighted to be involved in Christian Radio and look forward to developing that over the years, God willing.

I went to Cyprus! Oh boy did I go to Cyprus 🙂 First for 3 weeks then I came home for 4 weeks and went back for 6. It was an amazing experience that, when I get my head around it I will talk more about. But I got an insight in to the Middle East and the Arab people that has changed me forever. I cried my eyes out saying goodbye to people I was just getting to know, and they’ll always stay in my heart.

And I moved… more than once 🙂 I’m now a resident of the lovely village on Kilcullen in Co. Kildare and we’re going to Brannockstown Baptist Church.

It was an exciting year. And probably the best year I’ve had for a while. And it was the last year of my 30s. I’ve only a couple of months left before I enter a new decade and only God knows what is ahead.

There have been many times that I’ve said “Can’t wait to see the back of this year!” ” Can’t wait for the new year and a new start” etc. But I don’t say that any more. And when I heard some really sad news on New Years Day, that an old friend had taken his own life that day, I couldn’t help thinking that his poor family, only hours into the New Year would already want to see the back of 2012. I pray that they will know God’s compassion, faithfulness and mercy every day. I thank God that with him we can have a new start everyday. Lamentations 3 says

 22 Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed,
   for his compassions never fail.
23 They are new every morning; 
   great is your faithfulness.
24 I say to myself, “The LORD is my portion;
   therefore I will wait for him.”

I’m excited for 2012, my 40th birthday and all the potential and opportunities there are. But as the old song says, “One day at a time sweet Jesus….”

My Big Fat Wedding Dress :)

On By auntyamoIn Health, weight & wellbeing2 Comments

Dedicated to Karen Mulreid the newlywed and Jean Keeley the bride to be xx

There’s lots of wedding talk at the mo and it has reminded me of the prep for my wedding and one of the funniest days of my life…

Being someone of generous portions, sorry I mean proportions, finding a wedding dress was not very straightforward. There was the shop that had 200 wedding dresses in stock but only 2 that would go anywhere near me. One of them had that much boning in it that after I stepped out of it stood of its own volition for a good 5/6 seconds before falling to the ground in slow motion. The other one I’m sure was actually a marquee that had obviously been delivered to the wrong place!! It was just missing the ropes and the pegs!

My favourite encounter has to be with the lady who tried very very hard to sell me a dress but was very concerned about offending me. I was tempted to stop her and reassure her that I was aware that I was in fact not a size 10 and she didn’t have to apologise to me for that… but I was having too much fun 

Her sales blurb went something like this…

“Ohhhh ‘bride to be’ you must be excited. The girl who just left is a bundle of nerves, says she hasn’t eaten in a week. Are you the same? Oh… eh.. sorry. Anyway we do have a large, oh sorry, broad… well anyway…. a varied selection of dresses for … (averts eyes) the… larger lady. We have a catalogue here that you can look through and all these styles can be… well… re… well made to measure for…. (averts eyes) the… larger lady. We have a bespoke service too if you’d like to design your own style of dress. Obviously we’d need to leave plenty of time to make a dress your… I mean to make YOUR dress should I say… (panicked voice now reaching fever pitch….) how long til you wedding did you say?????”

She was close to tears by this stage. I was so sorry for her but it is definitely my funniest wedding shopping memory.

I didn’t buy my dress from her in the end. Got it made by the guy the Royal family used.

He makes the marquees for the Royal Garden Party!

For those who wanted an update on yesterday’s adventure

On By auntyamoIn Getting to grips with God stuffLeave a comment

So yesterday was the planned prayer day.

We decided to go for a drive up the mountains. Find somewhere to park with a nice view. Have a chat, pray for a while. And just listen. Seeking wisdom, seeking a view of the future and God’s grace.

So off we went. Found a beautiful little spot by a river and a bridge that we’ve been to many times.

As we’re sitting there I heard this noise comiing towards us, I opened my eyes and there was a car coming towards the bridge which was about 100 yards away from us. Can’t believe how close we were to danger!

The car was travelling at an unbelievable speed. It skidded around the bend hit a huge boulder which went crashing into the river. The car hit the bridge went up in the air flipped over a couple of times and landed cross ways on the bridge.

My prayers went from O Lord what should I do to, Gooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooood what will I do.

So I jumped out of the car, ran towards the bridge. One of the guys got out of the car and shouted for an ambulance.

I rang 999 and like a bumbling idiot tried to describe exactly WHERE up the mountains we were. Other cars arrived and couldn’t cross the bridge.

The Emergency Services (ES) guy on the phone asked me to go to the car and find out how many, how bad etc. I was terrified.

The guy who had called for the ambulance was obviously in a bad way so for some stupid reason i handed him my phone to talk to ES. The guys looked and sounded like they were drunk. And suddenly the other guy noticed me. He was not happy that I had been on the phone. He ‘warned’ me not to call the police. Suddenly I was in danger again. There were lots of people around but this guy was aggressive and wanted to make sure I didn’t call the fuzz!!!!

A truck pulled up and tried to get me and guy #2 to move so they can move the car. Guy #1 was rummaging in the car for stuff, still on my phone.
EVERYONE WAS ON THE PHONE ACTUALLY!!!!

So I got my phone thrown at me and got moved out of the way and in about 30 seconds the car was moved, the two guys jumped in the back of the truck and sped away.

I was actually shocked that I still had my phone and my life!!!!

We were still there when the police arrived, so I’m ‘helping them with their enquiries’ but I doubt I’ll hear from them again.

It took me a few hours to really calm down and remember why I was there in the first place.

So all in all, quite an adventure!
I thank God that He kept me safe.

And now an answer to my original question would be great 🙂

Mrs Doyle’s list of priests…. :)

On By auntyamoIn Humour25 Comments

I was doing a bit of surfing (internet that is…) and I came across this list!!!

It will only mean something to you if you have seen Fr. Ted. And if you have seen the episode when Todd Unctious comes to stay and Mrs. Doyle insists on guessing his name.

Someone has taken the time to put the list on the internet!!!!

Who does something like that? Sits there with a pen and paper and the remote control ready to pause…!

Actually it does sound like something I would do….

Anywya, in your best Mrs Doyle accent, take a deep breath… here we go…

Fr. Andy Riley,
Fr. Desmond Coyle,
Fr. George Byrne,
Fr. David Nicholson,
Fr. Declan Lynch,
Fr. Ken Sweeney,
Fr. Neil Hannon,
Fr. Keith Cullen,
Fr. Ciaran Donnelly,
Fr. Mick McEvoy,
Fr. Jack White,
Fr. Henry Bigbigging,
Fr. Hank Tree,
Fr. Hiroshima Twinkie
Fr. Stig Bubblecard,
Fr. Johnny Hellzapoppin’ ,
Fr. Luke Duke,
Fr. Billy Ferry,
Fr. Chewy Louie,
Fr. John Hoop,
Fr. Hairycake Linehan,
Fr. Rebulah Conundrum,
Fr. Peewee Stairmaster,
Fr. Jemima Racktool,
Fr. Jerry Twig,
Fr. Spodo Komodo,
Fr. Cannabranna Lammer.
Fr. Todd Unctious

YES!!!!!

Don’t tell me you got to the end of that list without laughing 😀

Music on a Monday – the 30 Day Song Challenge

On By auntyamoIn MusicLeave a comment

For ages I have been watching the 30 Day Song Challenge unfold on people’s Facebook pages.

I think it’s fascinating. I’m sure it would make a great psychology research project for somebody…

So far I’m only on day 6, but already I’m finding it tough.
The first question is ‘What is your favourite song?’

That all depends on the humour I’m in and the day of the week. That’ss why it took me so long to get started actually.

I have to say I am enjoying it. I love music and it is is really making me think about what I love and why..

I highly recommend it. Even if you don’t post each day… it’s worth having a think about it.

Here’s the list…
Day 01 – Your favorite song
Day 02 – Your least favorite song
Day 03 – A song that makes you happy
Day 04 – A song that makes you sad
Day 05 – A song that reminds you of someone
Day 06 – A song that reminds of you of somewhere
Day 07 – A song that reminds you of a certain event
Day 08 – A song that you know all the words to
Day 09 – A song that you can dance to
Day 10 – A song that makes you fall asleep
Day 11 – A song from your favorite band
Day 12 – A song from a band you hate
Day 13 – A song that is a guilty pleasure
Day 14 – A song that no one would expect you to love
Day 15 – A song that describes you
Day 16 – A song that you used to love but now hate
Day 17 – A song that you hear often on the radio
Day 18 – A song that you wish you heard on the radio
Day 19 – A song from your favorite album
Day 20 – A song that you listen to when you’re angry
Day 21 – A song that you listen to when you’re happy
Day 22 – A song that you listen to when you’re sad
Day 23 – A song that you want to play at your wedding
Day 24 – A song that you want to play at your funeral
Day 25 – A song that makes you laugh
Day 26 – A song that you can play on an instrument
Day 27 – A song that you wish you could play
Day 28 – A song that makes you feel guilty
Day 29 – A song from your childhood
Day 30 – Your favorite song at this time last year