Tag Archives: #aprilatoz

The A to Z of the Pastor’s Wife – Z is for Zig Zag

ZZ is for Zig Zag

So, here we are at the end of the challenge. I’m so glad I made it. I didn’t quite do it last year.

I feel that I’ve Zig-Zagged and wandered a lot in my thoughts over this A to Z Challenge. Thanks again for your comments and likes and for sticking with me.

This PW thing is still very new to me, and I’ve used the A to Z to think out loud about the questions and concerns that I have. For all my bravado and chuckles, I don’t want to make a pig’s breakfast of the whole thing. These posts have been helpful to me and the responses from readers has encouraged me to see the merits of some worries and meaningless of others. So thanks for that.

I do most things in a Zig Zag style. I’m a bit of a here, there and everywhere person, but that’s not always a bad thing. Let’s call it flexible. 🙂 Being someone who can zig zag will hopefully help when some unexpected stuff comes. I’ll be able to adapt and change. I just hope that over time, I will learn to balance that flexibility with consistency. I’ve a lot to learn, but lots of time to learn it.

In the mean time, by God’s grace and with himself beside me, I’ll do my best to be a good PW.

Farewell AtoZ friends. See you for the tour 🙂

The A to Z of the Pastor’s Wife – Y is for Yahtzee

YY is for Yahtzee

Himself introduced me to Yahtzee when we met. We love to play it, it’s a great game when there’s just the two of you – not many of them about.

He had the same 5 dice and little plastic tub to shake them in, for years. So one Christmas I decided to buy him a new set, complete with bright new shiny dice, colour score cards, a funky collapsible small dice shaker, all fitting in to a larger tub also used to throw the dice in (reducing risk of having to chase them around the floor). The wonderful thing is that he bought me the exact same present that year. One of them went back and was exchanged for another game which I’m not sure we’ve ever played.

Playing Yahtzee represents ‘our time.’ There’s no TV, usually some music in the background, we chat, we get a little bit competitive and we laugh. I suspect life will get busier and more stressful, and he won’t always be able to share things with me.

Part of my job as PW will be to make sure we always have time for Yahtzee (and that I win 😀 ).

The A to Z of the Pastor’s Wife – X is for Xenial

XX is for Xenial

Xenial is to be hospitable, especially to strangers or foreigners. (It is also defined as having something to do with pollinating flowers, but we’ll leave that for now 🙂 )

Himself and meself have been made so welcome by our church family. Already we feel like we know each other; since the very beginning we’ve felt at home. Back when it was new and a bit unnerving, waiting for the final decision to be made, we were always welcomed with open arms and hearts.

I grew up hearing a particular phrase regularly. “You’re in your Granny’s.” It means, you can relax, sit where you want to, help yourself to whatever you’d like. I remember a few years ago a missionary couple were doing some church visits near us and the accommodation they’d arranged had fallen through. We were asked to put them up. We had plenty  of space, so we said yes. I was worried though. They were going to be with us for a week; going out to different meetings; sometimes here for dinner, other days for lunch. I wanted them to feel like they were ‘in their granny’s’ and desperately hoping that wouldn’t mean them driving me mad.

They arrived late the after a meeting, and then they’d unpacked their car and coats were off, I asked if they would like anything before they went to bed. The answer came, “Do you mind if I have some toast please?” That night over tea and toast we became firm friends. I love that they felt comfortable to ask, and they loved the toast. To this day they are dear to us and we’ve visited them a few times for toast and chats.

Living on site means that we could have more visitors than we expect, at unexpected times. We want to keep the balance of having time to ourselves, but also sharing our time and our home with others. I hope we will always be ‘xenial’ as others were to us when we came here first. The only reason I cannot call them ‘xenial’ anymore is that we are no longer strangers, we’re family. x

The A to Z of the Pastor’s W…

WW is for Writer, Worker, Wife, Worshipper

I am a massive fan of Les Miserables. One of my fave songs, and moments of the show is when Jean Valjean sings. “Who am I?” He cannot deny who he really is and at risk to himself and his soon to be adopted daughter, he reveals his true identity.

The above list doesn’t sum me up totally, I can make a mean banana bread and am also a high-ranking expert in The After Eight Game. 🙂 I have always liked to have a mix of interests. I prefer to work, my least productive seasons are always the ones when I have lots of time on my hands. I work better when I’m busy.

I’ve had to rethink and rejig my time a bit over the last while. My writing has never really taken off again since I came back to the UK at the end of 2014. It’s a great source of frustration for me, but I have to let it come back in God’s time and at his pace. I know I’ll get into my stride again.

My job is not ‘difficult’ as such. It’s wonderful to be just around the corner and just part-time. Having been 15 years in donor support for charities, this is a different type of customer service. I can’t always give the customer the answer they are looking for, and I don’t like that. I’m much happier always being the bearer of good news…

I love being married. Himself is an absolute star and reminds me that he is my husband first and my pastor second; so i give myself permission to be his wife first, the pastor’s wife second. 🙂 We’ve been through the mill over the years. He’s been a steady rock in many stormy seas. I am blessed.

More than anything though, I want to be a worshipper. If I put my energies into that, my hope is that the other parts of my life will fall into place, in the right way at the right time. The only way I’ll do this thing right, is to stay close to God. Worship Him. Keep my eyes fixed and my heart open.

Who am I?


The A to Z of the Pastor’s Wife – U is for Useful & Useless

UU is for Useful and Useless

We’re nearing the end of the AtoZ Challenge. ‘U’ marks the start of the last week. Thank you all so much for reading and popping by; for liking and commenting. It’s been a great encouragement.

I haven’t read nearly as many as I would have liked to, but the AtoZ Reflections post and the AtoZ Roadtrip will give me time to catch up.

If you haven’t been following from the start, I used the theme of being a pastor’s wife so I could explore the many thoughts and feelings I have about the whole thing. Himself has been a Pastor since December of last year. We’re a few years older than most who start this work and still finding our feet. As I’ve mentioned before, the role of the ‘Pastor’ is well defined and a lot clearer than that of the spouse. I’m trying to learn what I should do and what I can do.

I don’t want to swoosh around in a flurry of activity hoping to look and feel useful, like I’m fulfilling some previously unattended purpose. Nor do I want to sit around doing nothing – which I could do because the church is very well run and looked after.

In Wednesday’s ‘W’ post, I’m going to explore this a little more as I write about who, and what, I am. One thing that has come up in a few posts is this – I can only be who I am. if I try to be anyone else it’ll be false and unnatural. I wish I could be, and give, more; but I’m pretty sure being myself is how I can of most use.

The A to Z of the Pastor’s Wife – S is for Sisterhood

SS is for Sisterhood

Once a week, a group of ladies from our church and other churches meet together for Sisterhood.

I had an idea of Sisterhood meetings in my head. They didn’t seem like my cup of tea at all. Far too quiet and formal for my liking.

I’ve been joyfully surprised by the Sisterhood meetings at our church. They are lively and fun. We have a mix of speakers, a couple of songs, some lovely chat and prayer; and of course a cup of tea and some cake.

I have been blessed far more than I thought I would be. I’ve been challenged too about my preconceptions and presumptions. I have laughed my head off, and cried my eyes out with these women. I’ve learned a lot and had an opportunity to share too. (Including children’s songs with actions – these women are nothing if not young at heart. 🙂 )

Amongst this group, there’s a love for God and His Word. And a love for each other that has shown me what Sisterhood really is. Not a meeting; a family.

The A to Z of the Pastor’s Wife – T is for Tea

TT is for Tea

Himself loves an ol’ cup of tea. His mother tells me that since she put a drop on a spoon and gave it to him, when he was still in his high chair, he loved it and has been a serious tea drinker ever since. (We can only thank God it wasn’t whisky she put on the spoon!)

The cup of tea (or coffee) after our church services is such a great event. Being a small church, most people who are on refreshments duty know who drinks what. So when you get to the counter, often your drink is handed to you just as you like it. I’ve done refreshments once or twice and the queue always takes longer to pass as I don’t have the list off by heart – yet.

Fellowship over a cuppa is a marvellous thing. It’s a vital part of church life. It’s how my brothers and sisters in Christ have become my friends. It’s how I’ve learned about their lives. It’s how I’ve come to understand a little more about what makes them tick. Not for general information gathering or to be ‘in the know’. I want to know so I can be of use, so I can pray intelligently, and I want them to be able to do the same for me.

The kettle is always on in our house, and regularly on in the church hall.
I find that very… refreshing 🙂